For the first time in my life, I rejected a higher responsibility. For the first time in my life, I lost my confidence.

X: I’ll give you the chance to run this outlet.
Me: Why me? She’s much more senior than me.
X: She can not commit to company’s demand. She can’t work weekends.
Me: Still.. I know she’s good. Give it to her. I’m not ready yet.

Yeah.. I’m not ready.. totally am not. Coward? Maybe. For some reasons, I became a coward. Hundred miles away from my kingdom across the sea, I’m only a tiny slave here.

Final announcement, three of us was sitting together.
X: Y won’t be here anymore. Starting today, Z will be the first person in charge for this outlet. Prila, you will be the second person in charge. Anyway it won’t be for long. I want you to learn as much as you can from her. Remember, it’s not for long.

The flag was given to her. I smiled. Sorry, Sir. I knew I let you down. But one thing.. I’m very sure now, it was a wise decision. I saw how she dealt with this responsibility. She’s great, I could already feel it, no doubt.

Only a little flashback that made me a bit miserable. Again.. my kingdom across the sea.
My X-Boss: Prila, we’re opening the 2nd outlet. Can you take care of that?
Extinct Me: I’ll try my best.
…….
My X-Boss: Surabaya will need someone during the pre-opening to provide good trainings and make sure everything is up to standard. I’ll send you there to make that happen.
Extinct Me: My pleasure, boss.
…….
My X-Boss: My manager screwed up. The opening was already delayed two times. You.. Take over!
Extinct Me: Give me all the contact numbers. I’ll do my best to catch up.
(After some times action and reaction…)
My X-Team: Miss.. so glad you’re here. Boss was very angry. But with you here, we really hope we can open next week.
Extinct Me: I bet we can. But please, let’s work hard together. Don’t worry, we will open next week.

That ‘Me’.. is extinct here somehow. To all my x-bosses, x-superiors, x-staffs, x-colleagues, all my teams, and my close friends there in Jakarta.. who always have confidence in me.. I know I am disappointing you all. Forgive me.. pray for me.. I’m trying hard to mend the pieces of my broken strength. I’ll be awake someday, I promise.